taiwan birthday!
07-31-08heee~ my second ever bday overseas. happy happy.
taiwan’s a pretty nice place. but i really need to know chinese to survive here. =((( i guess i’ll pick it up when (if) i stay here long enough.
the architecture’s really japanese. but the people remind me a lot of those from the hdb estates in singapore. never knew there were so many chinese people in the world. we’re in tainan, which is south of taiwan. so it’s pretty laidback, not like taipei city i think.
anw today’s concert didn’t go very well for me. my embouchure is just plain screwed up. i’ve been trying to change it for two weeks now. and it seems to be working (half-working actually - i’m in the midst of the change). i didn’t practise on mon and tues and today (wed) i just couldn’t use both the new and the old one. so basically my holding notes sounds like a beginner’s. i hate to use this an excuse as it makes me sound weak, but i think that that’s the case. so i shall have to live with it for now, despite also being in the midst of concerts. arrrgghhhh
damn. it.
but T says i should just stick with the new one and keep to it. hope tmr will be a better day. *crosses fingers* i should sleep soon. tmr’s a long day and i haven’t packed yet.
ohhh and my reeds kinda suck. the good one back in singapore is SUPER DUPER reedy blasty now. i don’t know why… and i hope it will change back when i get back =((((( i don’t know if it’s the humidity, the altitude or just cos i’ve not practised for two days that causes the reed to be like that. so now i’m using an old and very hard reed, which makes my lips tire easily. then again the tiring of my lips could be cos of the changing of embouchure. but again these could be excuses and i’m a person who hate excuses.
argh.
happy birthday to me once again. hope tmr’s concert will be better.
it’s time to go
07-27-08this next ntusb concert will be the last one that i’m regularly attending wed practice for. it’s just one of the strings i have to let go. so that i won’t compromise on work so much. besides, i’d much rather practise at home, individually. i would definitely get so much more things worked on.
but the past four years have been a good four years for me. the ties that i’ve built are going to stay with me for a long long time. i’ve also learnt a lot related to band music. i guess i’m just playing the wrong instrument for a wind band. there are a handful of wind pieces that are challenging for my instrument surely, but most of it is still bomchatchat for me. and ntusb was not really a place for my instrument. however, i’m glad i had the opportunity to also take part in other bands like nie, where i had more challenging parts. and also, now currently the bda band (albeit ad hoc - and albeit with most of the repertoire still bomchatchat.)
also, to be fair to ntusb, it’s not really bomchatchat pieces all the way??? it’s just most of the time - 90% - it’s always bassoon sharing parts with either eupho, trombone, bass clar or bari sax or sax, such that it just always gets hidden. so even if it’s a running or melodic passage, i just hide lor. but to be fair, if i didn’t join ntusb, or any band for that matter, i wouldn’t have understood bassoon playing, and the confidence gained.
not to worry though, i’ll stay for sat practices till wmc at least. so that the lower winds’ part can be gao-dimmed. meanwhile i’m looking forward to freeing up my wed nights so that i can do individual practice, not be tied up with having to cab down (30 freaking dollars) to ntu after work and i can stay in the office a little later. i’ll also at least continue to play for their concerts. just turn up last few practices can le. unless they are playing really difficult pieces. but i forsee more bomchatchat for now.
meanwhile there are other musical groups i’m looking forward to indeed. one of which is the OMM. although i’m most likely the oldest there, i think it’s still quite fun leh. more cohesive than the sunday orchestra.
p-winds are having an audition soon. for all instrumentation. but they already have 2 zai bsnists. i don’t understand why they are having audition. it’s either i go and try to join and if i get in i can learn from the 2. or i join only to realise they’re leaving that’s why it’s audition for all instrumentation then it defeats the purpose of me joining to learn from better players. i think i’ll just work on my sound/technique individually for the time being.
i guess while i’ve learnt to appreciate band music, with most of the influence coming from anneson’s car, i realise that while the pieces may sound nice, hmmmmmmm my parts are just so boring! i guess my early orchestral influences still stay with me very very much, but i’m glad i have embraced both genres, and will continue to do so.
tmr is the 12th week of work. i’m indeed starting to get into the flow of things, what with having to change department and all. but i really do need a break. just to get away from it all, and to think abt what i want to do with my life. how i’m going to approach it, and how i really should. first off, tmr i’m going to give up comfort for time. i’m not going to take the bus but the train. the marginal cost of comfort now is higher than the marginal benefit of spending the time travelling to do something else. let’s see how it goes.
finally a post in a long long time
07-22-08ahhh finally a post worthy enough to fit into my ever-so-busy schedule.
today’s concert was bittersweet! it’s the first in a long long time since i felt this way, that is, unsure and nervous and super insecure. we played Appalachian Spring - which was originally composed to have nothing to do with the Appalachian imagery or Spring for that matter.
anyway, we played the original version, i.e. scored for 13 instruments. so literally everyone was a soloist. and every part was just as important, to bring out the colour of the piece…
mind you, it is not an easy piece, and that could again, be an excuse in itself. i could have given twenty thousand other excuses - it was a bad reed day…i’m still changing my embouchure… i’m also trying out new fingerings… but no matter what, a performance is still a performance, and an excuse still an excuse. just like what was preached last sunday; no matter a bad excuse or a good excuse, an excuse is still an excuse. so basically performances should be flawless and there should be no excuses. if you don’t get it right, it means that you didn’t practise it enough.
but yeah mistakes are made nonetheless. and there’s no point crying over spilled milk. just don’t spill the milk next time. if there’s a next time.
but this concert is really different, the last time i felt so insecure was the wmc competition, where i really couldn’t play a single note on my instrument. this time round, it’s the nature of the piece. it’s moved me away from my comfort zone of bom-chat-chat band pieces, and super harmonic orchestral pieces, to a more disjunct style of blending in. the colours created are just too bright…
but it’s a really nice piece. and i must say that, in the many times i’ve heard it on my mp3 player and during rehearsals, each time i hear something new, something different. which is realy cool. and it’s this playing with my hearing that causes me to sometimes lose focus, esp during rehearsals when i don’t come in cos i’m listening too much, and not paying attention to my score. and then i hear a somewhat empty-sounding portion, and think to myself, “isn’t someone supposed to come in here???” and then i realise “oh shit it’s me!”… yeah bimbo moment…
concert went ok, it wasn’t perfect.. i’d give myself a just passed. but the thing i really have to blog abt is that at the parts where i usually screw up, i didn’t. and the parts where i usually don’t, i did. call it as R says, Murphy’s law, but i choose to think otherwise. I knew where the parts were that i usually screwed up, and as i approached, i prayed as i played. literally. telling God to put me through this passage, put me through this passage, and everything indeed went smoothly. it felt as if i were riding on the wings of an eagle… however, the parts where i felt the most confident, i just totally *whammed* it. i even forgot a fingering for an impt note!!! *slaps myself*. this evening really helped to increase my faith. it was pretty surreal, cos i was having even the slightest doubt as i approached the passages where i usually screw up, but just before i play it, i’m like, ok God, i’m just depending on you. only on you all for you, and it flows past like a stream of water. but the moment i had a little self-pride like “oh i hope so-and-so is impressed by my playing” *WHAM* someone throws a rock into that stream of water…and i just tumble..
nonetheless i had fun learning this piece… and also it was a pleasure to be under Dr. Joyce Koh she has such a bubbly and sweet personality. oh well im sure going to miss playing this piece. 4 practices are surely not enough, but again that’s another excuse i shouldn’t be making. if i didn’t make it, it means i’m lousy and lazy, and oh well get over it. there’s no way to go but up.
so hair-ppening lah
07-2-08my hairdresser scolded me for putting on weight!!!!!
=(((((
he also nagged at me to exercise more… die le…
actually i also think it’s time i start doing so. cos now that i’ve built up my air from zero to 20%…i can’t seem to go any further no matter even if i’m practising everyday. i think i need to be fitter physically in order to improve my air/lung capacity…
so……… I’M GONNA START AN EXERCISE REGIME!!!! probably have to be at night lor. since day is taken up by everything else. tmr i’m bringing back my bike. *gives determined look*
and it so doesn’t help that there are LOTS of snacks in my office. i’m literally eating the ENTIRE day. munch munch munch munch munch. be it to keep myself awake or simply that the snack is very addictive, i’m always snacking, so that’s why i’m declaring tomorrow “No Snack For Emerald In The Office Day”. hope i can keep to my resolution. *prays hard*
then….you know now i’ve got this fringe.. my hairdresser said it was smart of me to cut a fringe so that i can hide my eyebrows. cos he commented that my eyebrows were “disgusting” and scolded me again for not trimming them. WAH! like that also can scold! haha.. so he happened to have his blade and he took it out and trimmed for me. >.<
it feels a little “naked” now… i like my eyebrows untrimmed..but oh well for the sake of “beauty”. but he was really nice abt it… didn’t charge me extra and even stayed OT to do that bit of trimming. i guess he really cannot stand it until a certain point le.
this guy’s really not bad. i’d recommend him to any of my friends. girls though. i’ve never seen him do a cut on a guy friend yet. any virgin takers? he’s really good so far. but i realises he does very good asian cuts… i don’t think ang moh can but their hair under him. haha.
oh and tmr is cannot-play-instrument-cos-going-to-teach-piano-in-the-west-so-i-have-no-time-to-practise-day. sigh. i predict a moody me tmr.
